Seeker of Happiness

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Friday Fibs Part I

"Friday Fibs"Carrie Lynn2 Comments
Congratulations to Jennifer Dean- winner of the $25 gift card to Tickled Peach Studio! Please email me at cuzitsfunny@hotmail.com and I will get you in touch with Kathy :)


A bit ago, my dear friend Amber and I were talking about how we are accidental liars. Sometimes, we're really good liars, and sometimes we're really bad liars. But we NEVER lie on purpose or with malice. Sometimes, little lies just pop out. Like when Amber walked into the wrong church found that for some reason, she just couldn't tell people she was in the wrong place. Or when I used my roommates body wash and came out of the shower smelling like Dove, and when she asked me if I had used her soap I said no. Even though I was standing there, smelling like her soap.

The good news is, our lies have not really come to hurt anyone (we think) and they are usually pointless. We hate when this happens, and we hate it more when we explain ourselves to people and they say: "why didn't you just say that?" and we have to say: "I really don't know."

 We're honest when it matters. Also, I had one bad experience with a professor and a Croation accent that (almost) put my lying to a halt.

As we were swapping stories and cracking up, I said: "Seriously, I have so many of these I could probably start a weekly feature on my blog." To which Amber exclaimed: "Friday Fibs!"

So here we are. 

This won't be a permanent feature (geez- I'm not pathological) but I thought it would be fun to write down some of my crazy fibs... if anything to tell my posterity not to lie.


Don't lie, posterity!


But let's begin...

I was at the DMV getting my liscense renewed. Anna was with me for some reason and after waiting forever in line, I had to fill out one final form. I filled it out the best of my ability and handed to the big lady with red lipstick behind the counter. She glanced at it, looked at me dead on and said:

"Please complete the form."

I was embarrassed that I had missed something that, apparently, was obvious enough for her to speak to me so delibrately. When I looked over the form, however, I couldn't find my mistake.

"Sorry, I don't see what I missed."

"It's not complete. You need to complete the form."

Her tone was both flat and forceful and I didn't want to tick her off anymore, but I HONESTLY could not find what I had missed. I started laughing. She didn't.

I used my finger to go over each line and everything looked complete. This was now taking an obnoxious amount of time and the line behind me was piling up. I asked Anna to look over the form and point out anything I might of missed. She did, and then we got fits of giggles at the awkwardness of the situation and how we REALLY couldn't find my mistake! Meanwhile, the woman behind the counter kept her scowl and reminded me repeatedly that the form was not complete.

Finally, I asked her "Could you just SHOW me what I missed? I would happy to fill it out, I just honestly don't see what I missed."

To which she responded: "Use your EYES."

Oh no she didn't.

I was totally taken aback at this woman's crass! But my mouth wasn't taken aback. Before I could even think it popped out:

"Sorry. It's just that I have dyslexia and these forms are really hard for me."

Her eyes went wide. Her face drained with color and then turned red. She started stammering about how sorry she was and pointed her manicured nail to a spot on the form I was supposed to check mark.

"It's okay," I said "I'm not actually dyslexic, but what if I was?!"

She held her hand over her heart and let out an audible sigh of relief
"Oh you scared me!"

I still kind of laugh about this one. Because really- what a jerk lady! I hope she learned her lesson. But I mean, I probably could have handled the situation with less giggling and lying and with more tact. I'm still a little torn though... I mean sometimes, the only way to get your point across is to tell someone you're dyslexic.